17. lip 2007.

A teatime chat with destiny (Eng)

Mr. Hammock was just preparing his 5 o'clock tea, when he heard a knock on his front door. It wasn't a hard, loud knock, the kind of ruffians or dock workers make, nor it wasnt a quiet, hard to hear, kind of knock. It was jast a simple, aknowledgeable but not disturbing, knock.
He put down the hot kettle and rushed to the door. "Who is it "? Without even waiting for an answer, he looked trough the spyglass, having to stand up on his toes. There was a man standing outside. He was dressed all in gray, from his shoes, to his hat. Even his mustache were gray. And his eyes. And his umbrella. He even seemed to blend into the wall next to him. Man just stood there, not saying a word. He was what the people would call a perfect gentleman. Mr. Hammock opened the heavy door, and just stared into the stranger.
"Hello. How are you? My Name is Mr. Destiny. May I come in"?
 He took of his gray hat and coat, and with liberty like he is the owner of the house, he hanged them on a hanger. Mr. Hammock was just standing there, stuned by the impoliteness of a simple act, as storing garments in someone else's house. And even more to his confusion, the stranger walked past him into the kitchen, like he doesnt exist. "Excuse me, but why are you barging into my home"? 
"Ah, I was just coming to to that"... Mr. Destiny alredy took the kettle from the stove, and was now sitting on a chair, pouring hot tea into an ordinary glass, because he couldnt find teacups anywhere. He extended his arm, and poured some tea in another glass; "Sugar"?
"Er, no thanks. The teacups are in upper left cabinet "... Now Hammock was reaching the peak of his confusion: an unknown person was in his house, and was making him tea. " Now, where was I? Ah yes"... The man reached inside his west, and pulled out an old, tattered scroll. He rolled it open, revealing a page filled with small print. "Now when youre ready, sign here" pointing at a line in the bottom of the paper.

                        One way passport to heaven
By this document a person/ animal/ object, gains a full pledged right, to enter heaven at any time after the formal signing of this document. That person/ animal/ object, doesnt have to pass the trials, wich separate the sinners from true belivers, and is automatically erased from all sins, aloving him/ her/ it to pass trough the gates of heaven. The person, animal, or object cannot carry any object with him, material or spiritual, and must leave all his belongins on earth. Furthermore, this contract must be signed in the presence of Mr. Destiny, otherwise, it is not valid.

                                                                                      Sign here:

"What is this? Who are you", said Mr. Hammock, not being so calm any more.
"I have many names: Time, Death, God, Luck; but I prefer being called Mr. Destiny. And if you havent realized it by now, I came to traverse your soul from the material world to heaven. Not that you have been goody goody two shoes all your liftime, but youre making an awful lot of trouble for me, and its not worth the effort changing the world the third time" said Mr. Destiny.
"What do you mean changing the world the third time? Does this visit have to do anything with the tower? Were only building it to see whats above the clouds" said Mr. Hammock, not realizing he has been pouring milk into his tea for over a minute now.
"It has everything to do with the Tower! Where do you think youll get when you go above the clouds! Like you dont know where heaven is"!
"So.. Heaven really exists"?
"Ofcourse it exists! Where do you think you go when you die? France!?!    No! You people had to do it all again... You dreamers, rulebreakers, mavericks... All you ever do is cause me trouble. Why do you people have to be se curious"?!
(In another world, in another reality, there would be a word describing Mr. Destinys mood, and it would be pissed of)
"I dont understand, what do you mean by changing the world the third time"?
"Oh, youre smart enuogh to build enormous tower, or go over the edge off the world but youre not smart to realize what im saying!?!
First time I had to change the world was eons ago, when man first started looking for god, I mean me. Back then, earth was still a plate, and from some twisted human logic, it seemed to your ancestors, that the most probable place where god could be, is bellow the earth. So he started digging larger and larger holes looking for me. Unfortunately, I didnt predict that, and to prevent him falling into hell, wich has to exist somewhere, i put more earth beneath him, so he gave up". Mr. Destiny was obiviously getting frustrated.
"How could you not predict that, being that youre god, and you probably can see into the future"? said Mr. Hammock.
"See, there it is again, your god-damned curiosity !!! In universe, there is one thing no one can predict, even all-powerfull deitys, and that is human stupidity!
The second time, however, I had to be more creative... Again, man started to look for god, and since earth was still a plate, he started building bridges. Not ordinary bridges, but structures that went over the edge of the world. Once again, I had to intervene, so I turned the world into a globe. And now youre reaching for the skies. Do you know how hard it is, changing the world? When will you get it that the world isnt predicted to work that way".
"So... What now" asked Mr. Hammock.
"Now you stop the building of the tower, sign, and go to heaven...
"And what if I dont"?
"You will. Ive seen it" said Mr. Destiny.
"What about human stupidity? How can you predict that"?
"Are you stupid"?
"No" said Mr. Hammock.
"Then I have seen it. Just sign, Ive still got some business to finish".

Autor: Mihailo Isakov



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